wat bout pragnant strippers??
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
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