I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
