Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
She even gives head with a lisp.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Randomize
