i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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