Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize