I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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