we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
