Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize