He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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