I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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