If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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