I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
