so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Randomize
