Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
The maid of honor just puked.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
