Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I enjoy the company of your penis
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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