at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Randomize
