I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
