I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
