Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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