What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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