my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize
