I'm laying in your front yard are you home
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
