And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Randomize
