2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
