Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Randomize
