i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize