Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
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