also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I don't think brook has ever known best
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
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