I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
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