She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
She told me I should be a condom model.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
