thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
