her vagine was all disorganized.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
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