it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
as a side note pls kill me
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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