Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Randomize
