i just ordered a pitcher of margaritas for me and a friend but she called and canceled. oh well, looks like im getting trashed alone.
the waiter who hardly speaks english told me "i go get your medicine now"
this medicine is soooo good.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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