I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
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