That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
My vagina is very pro this idea
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