i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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