I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
I forgot how hot balto sounded
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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