If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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