as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Randomize
