my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
do nipples grow back?
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