Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
i out mim tonsoeep
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
