Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
