What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
