you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
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