addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Randomize
