I just made out with a guy for $7.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
