Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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