I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
it's like iHOP with fire
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
