Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
