The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
